Welcome to our Family Court Custody Crisis blog.
What experts see as Domestic Violence cases Courts treat as High Conflict cases. Most divorces typically settle without a trial, but in some 3.8% of cases, where parents are fighting over custody and visitation of their children, you’ll almost inevitably find Domestic Violence or Coercive Control.
America’s Custody Courts are failing to protect America’s children’s health and safety because they are not considering crucial scientific research and often relying on the wrong experts.
These are the cases the courts get wrong; most of the time. These are the children the Safe Child Act protects.
If you’d like to write for the Stop Abuse Campaign, or you’d like to publish your story on our blog, please contact us at info@stopabusecampaign.org.
ACEs and Neurofeedback Therapy for Trauma
Stop Abuse Campaign Issues Statement about Colorado Springs Club Q Shooting
Crime prevention starts with protecting children
Stop Abuse Campaign Advocate and Expert Joins Board
Suicide prevention means child protection
ACEs and Neurofeedback Therapy for Trauma
Can neurofeedback help in healing from childhood trauma and PTSD? Read on to learn more about one of the science-backed ways to overcome ACEs.
Stop Abuse Campaign Issues Statement about Colorado Springs Club Q Shooting
Gun violence plays a significant role in children’s lives, and we know that childhood trauma is a major contributor to most violence.
Crime prevention starts with protecting children
Crime is a complex issue. Protecting children from Adverse Childhood Experiences prevents crime and strengthens communities.
Stop Abuse Campaign Advocate and Expert Joins Board
National Known Justice Leader Howard Spivak brings decades of experience to help prevent Adverse Childhood Experiences.
Suicide prevention means child protection
Preventing suicide means preventing the pain that leads to it. When we do this, we will make real progress in reducing suicide in communities.
Homelessness is a journey that starts in the family
Homelessness is a key American problem. It’s also one least understood. What causes homelessness? How do we solve this problem as a society?
Stop Abuse Campaign Gains a Champion in Preventing Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs)
Former Director of the CDC’s National Center for Injury Prevention and Control Linda Degutis brings decades of experience to Board Chair.
How America Can Break the Cycle and Prevent Drug Abuse
Drug abuse is one of the worst issues in America. its effects are horrendous, but its root causes are more complex than everyone assumes.
Why we won’t see Jeffrey Epstein’s list and why it doesn’t matter
Why seeing Jeffrey Epstein’s list of clients will not prevent child sexual abuse, but addressing your own biases will.
What is MIECHV? Overview and Importance of Maternal Home Visiting Programs
What is the Maternal, Infant, and Early Childhood Home Visiting (MIECHV programs) and how important it is in saving our future?
How you can save babies whose mothers have substance use disorders
1 in 10 US babies is addicted to a substance and off to a lousy start. How to help mothers with substance use disorders and their babies?
Incest the Unforgivable
Sexual abuse survivor starts their own non-profit, One Life One Heart International, to help survivors with their healing and empowerment.
What is the point of Anti LGBTQ laws? We are here. We are queer. And, we are not going away.
A sharp increase in anti-LGBTQ legislation with almost half targeting transgender people. States introduced a record of 238 bills in 2022.
The monster will get us, be quiet
A Survivor Story of a traumatic childhood, a life of consequences, and a grandfather who has healed from the monsters he might awake.
How to Help Homeless LGBTQ Youth in America
LGBTQ youth have higher ACE scores than their peers. Homeless LGBTQ youth, however, is another level of the problem, a sad reality in the US. How to help?
What is Childhood like for Nonbinary Youth?
As the world is getting up to date with the nonbinary youth identity, the new ACEs research insights instill hope in protecting these children.
Suicide among LGBTQ Youth: Risks and Prevention
Suicide rates among LGBTQ youth are shocking and require our immediate attention. Learn more about the risks and how you can help prevent it.
Childhood memories
Our Survivor Story this week. A tale of abuse, addiction, and recovery through healing the inner child, but above all, a story of hope.
Why We Oppose Gender-affirming Healthcare Bans
A lot of politicized misinformation is being touted about gender-affirming healthcare. Here are the reasons we’re opposing banning it.
Preventing school shootings
How do we prevent more school shootings? What do the experts know about school shootings, gun violence, children, and ACEs?
Surviving low self esteem
Our survivor story features surviving low self-esteem. Discovering what you want to do with your life, and moving on to happiness.
Am I Depressed? Depression Symptoms, Causes, Therapy
Have you ever felt you can’t shake negative thoughts and the stresses of the world are too much? We discuss depression symptoms, causes, and therapy.
My journey of healing my inner child
Our Survivor Story this week. A tale of abuse, addiction, and recovery through healing the inner child, but above all, a story of hope.
The Ugly Truth About Mental Health Stigma
Why would someone not seek help for a mental health issue? Societal mental health stigma is the answer. How to prevent it and help people?
Does Anyone Care? Shocking Barriers Killing Our Mental Health
Does anyone care about our mental health in America? How do we remove the barriers to mental health care access in our country, so we can get proper help?
Thoughts on suicide prevention from a survivor
The Stop Abuse Campaign founder’s survivor story uncovers why -and how- suicide prevention must be one of America’s mental health priorities.
Am I Crazy? Anxiety Symptoms, Causes, Treatment
If you feel fear, dread, or are overwhelmed, making your life difficult, you may have anxiety. We discuss anxiety symptoms, causes, relation to ACEs, and treatment.
Why I Meditate (And You Should Too)
Meditation has been practiced for thousands of years, aiding mental health. We explore what it really is, how to meditate, and what are its benefits, types, and purpose.
My Mental Health is Bad! Why and What Now?
May is mental health awareness month. In this article, we talk about what mental health is, why it’s important, how it relates to ACEs, and how you can help.
Survivor Story: Hammered Down
TRIGGER WARNING: Brave DV survivor tells her story. It starts with a father who hit her mother with a sledgehammer, but it doesn’t end there.
ACE 101: Parental Mental Illness
In a house with impressionable children, the untreated parental mental illness has serious consequences for children’s development. How can we prevent this ACE?
ACE 101: Physical Neglect in Childhood
Physical neglect in childhood may mean different things in different contexts. We’re unpacking what it is, what it isn’t, and how to protect children from this ACE.
ACE 101: Parental Separation, Divorce, or Death
Parental divorce and separation, including the death of a loved one, are Adverse Childhood Experiences. Were you affected by them? What to do and how to get help?
ACE 101: Parental Substance Abuse
Parental substance abuse is an ACE, a childhood trauma as damaging as other direct ones. How does it affect the child and how can we prevent it?
Grounding in Toes & Yoga
An abuse survivor with the 10 ACE score tells her story about her journey into fully loving herself by grounding with yoga and mindfulness.
ACE 101: Intimate Partner Violence
Domestic and intimate partner violence are Adverse Childhood Experiences that weaken a family’s chance for stability and safety. How to help and get help?
ACE 101: Childhood Emotional Neglect
Childhood emotional neglect is one of the most challenging ACEs to identify because there’s nothing to “see,” but it impacts thousands of children every year with damaging consequences. How to help?
Blessed or Cursed? Growing up in a Catholic Orphanage
A survivor story of surviving child abuse, growing up in a Catholic orphanage and turning it into a life purpose of healing others.
ACE 101: Physical Abuse in Childhood
Physical abuse against children causes lifelong harm. This common ACE can be prevented. Read more on why and how we can dedicate resources to prevention.
The Show Must Go On? An Abuse Survivor’s Take on Will Smith Slapping Chris Rock
The world is shocked at Will Smith slapping Chris Rock. An abuse survivor’s take on it urges us to question our own responsibility in abuse collectively.
ACE 101: Incarcerated Household Member
Having an incarcerated household member is an ACE, Adverse Childhood Experience, that can have lasting consequences into adulthood. How to help?
De-normalizing child abuse
A survivor story called Denormalizing child abuse shows how while abuse can become normal to a child, child abuse is never normal.
ACE 101: Childhood Emotional Abuse
What is childhood emotional abuse? Learn about this ACE, its life-long consequences, ways to prevent it, heal it, and help someone affected.
ACE 101: Preventing Child Sexual Abuse
A vital part of fighting child sexual abuse is learning about what it is and why we must prevent it from happening to any child ever again.
Raised by Predators: Surviving Child Sexual Abuse
A survivor story called Raised By Predators is about surviving child sexual abuse and then healing from it.
Is There a Link between Childhood Trauma and Heart Disease?
There’s one correlation of heart disease that you may have never considered. What’s the link between childhood trauma and heart disease?
Types of Therapy and Mental Health Providers
Thinking of getting into therapy? It’s essential to know your options. We discuss the common types of therapy, therapists, and counselors.
How to Choose a Therapist: Tips and Fits
Therapy can truly change your life, but choosing a therapist can be a daunting task. How to choose a therapist fit to your specific needs?
How to heal from ACEs and childhood trauma
Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) can negatively impact your life into adulthood. How to heal from ACEs and childhood trauma? Read on.
Self-Parenting for Abuse Survivors
Self-parenting for abuse survivors is an important healing process for your inner child that will move you towards a better future.
We Need to Talk about ACEs and Suicide
Understanding the connection between ACEs and suicide can help you see the warning signs and may ultimately save someone’s life.
Research Roundup September 2021
We discuss ACEs and school performance. ACEs may affect outcomes in adulthood through disrupted neurodevelopment
Protecting Children from Online Predators
The online predator’s target is a vulnerable child. Protecting children from online predators is the responsibility of all of us.
Research Roundup Summer 2021
In this Research Roundup Summer 2021 edition, we’re addressing the recall bias in measuring ACEs in many ACEs studies.
5 Ways Surviving Child Abuse Is Like Training for the Olympics
You may be surprised by these five ways in which surviving child abuse is much like training for the Olympics.
Research Roundup June 2021
We discuss ACEs score strengths, limitations, and misapplications to determine how we can best use and interpret the ACEs test and framework.
Research Roundup May 2021
Does the timing of ACEs exposure matter and how? We discuss this topic in our Research Roundup May 2021 edition.
Research Roundup April 2021
ACEs patterns and their impact. Different ACEs can be grouped in meaningful ways, and different ACEs have different risks in later life.
Generational abuse torch-passing
Are you the Cinderella or a stepsister in your family’s story of generational abuse? How will you pass on the generational abuse torch?
Research Roundup March 2021
This month’s column focuses on how the distribution of ACEs is context-dependent: ACEs vary by space, time, and contextual factors.
Research Roundup February 2021
How ACEs affect reproductive trajectories in women who are pregnant, as well as the role of social support in improving birth outcomes.
Research Roundup January 2021
Parental Adverse Childhood Experiences. Researchers examined a wide range of health outcomes in kids whose parents were exposed to ACEs.
Adverse Childhood Experiences Are Linked to Juvenile Justice System Contact, Columbia Review Shows
Review showing that higher Adverse Childhood Experience (ACE) scores are associated with a greater risk of juvenile justice system contact.
The Science Behind Coercive Control and Adverse Outcomes During Pregnancy
In a two-part series with the ACECC Journal, we will discuss prenatal non-physical abuse and the long-term effects on children.
Research Roundup December 2020
Adverse Childhood Experiences were associated with functional limitations and dementia in two studies of older Japanese adults
Menu for the holidays: turkey, ham, and…elephant?
Holidays for abuse survivors: it is not your job to swallow the truth elephant just to make your family feel comfortable.
Research Roundup November 2020
Maternal depression is linked to poor outcomes and mothers who have experienced ACEs in childhood may be at higher risk of depression.
Self Imposed Catch 22s – A Lasting Symptom of Narcissistic Abuse
What is Narcissistic Abuse? How can it be characterized? What is the ‘double-message double-bind” that abusers use? What can you do?
Stop Abuse Campaign remarks about the tragic death of Kenneth Wayne Mason
Stop Abuse Campaign remarks about the tragic death of Kenneth Wayne Mason
Sharing the burden of pain as a community
Suffering kept silent is a heavy-weight on the soul but sharing the burden of pain with your community can be difficult if they don’t want to hear.
Strength in brokenness
The world breaks everyone and afterward, many are strong at the broken places.”— Ernest Hemingway, A Farewell to Arms. Broken doesn’t mean beyond repair.
Heal your inner child by creating a place for them in your adult home
Integrate your younger-self into your adult life. An abusive upbringing can make us feel like our young-self is still in our childhood home.
5 tips for friends of survivors
Your friend has just told you that they have been sexually assaulted, abused, stalked or raped and you want to support them but you’re not sure what they need. Maybe it happened to them decades ago, in childhood, or maybe it was as recent as today. You want to help your friend in any way you can. Situations may vary, but here are 5 tips for friends of survivors.
How to cope with anxiety
Having anxiety is difficult to explain to people. Sometimes, you feel like everything is falling into place, and the next, your world feels like it’s crashing down on you. Stress, feelings of neglect, worries about the future, all of these can combine into an anxiety episode or attack.
9 things to know about consent
The word “consent” gets thrown around as if everyone understands it. The basics are easy, but the nuances of consent can get complicated.
Consent matters; so does teaching it
Consent matters. Set your own boundaries and respect the boundaries of others. We don’t need complicated contracts, we need a revolution.
Healing through the power of memoir
A memoir contains a magical ability to heal. Discover how using a memoir for healing from abuse works? How do you start?
How to protect your children from sex offenders
Do you know how to protect your children from sex offenders? Cory Jewell Jensen talks about her work with sex offenders and what she knows
10 signs of a toxic relationship
No relationship is perfect, be it familial, a friendship, romantic relationship, or a marriage, yet any of these can be a toxic relationship
What a rape kit is (and isn’t)
Using these rape kits, evidence can be collected from a crime scene and when it comes to assault, that crime scene is the survivor’s body.
We Need a Revised Definition of “Physical Abuse”
When people think of physical abuse they think of black eyes, busted lips, and broken arms or noses. But what if it wasn’t?
Abuse with hands, words and… bathroom scales?
Did you experience food abuse? When a parent has food available and chooses to withhold it from their child it is neglect.
Abuse survivors and our bodies: mistaking correlation with causation
Abuse Survivors and Our Bodies. Did you suffer child abuse? If so. you may care about yourself less because you think nobody cares about you.
Sometimes it’s just time for a new family tree
No matter how much one breaks the cycle of abuse, it can’t magically and retroactively change the leaves and branches of one’s family tree.
ACE scores in prison
The US has the largest prison population in the world and highest per-capita incarceration rate but how are we treating the high rate of ACEs in prison?
What racism and abuse have in common
Victims of racism or abuse have a lot in common. Azure Moyna shares the greatest gift you can give someone who has been abused or mistreated.
Give back to the Stop Abuse Campaign with Amazon Smile
Donate to the Stop Abuse Campaign at no cost to you. Shop from home as you socially distance and Amazon Smile supports the Stop Abuse Campaign.
The Language of Abuse
How to lose the language of abuse and achieve the miracle of actually being able to think in the new language. Emotional language is everything.
How to Break the Cycle of Abusive Parenting
Are you a victim of abusive parenting and now a parent yourself? Wonder how to break the cycle of abusive parenting? Here are some ways.
Post-COVID call to action for childminders
Countless children are enduring hell at home with their abusers. Those who work with children will need to watch for signs of abuse when the kids return.
Everyone needs a co-pilot
Trusting someone with your story of abuse is a huge hurdle to overcome if you have been sexually abused. You need a sexual abuse co-pilot.
Coercion
Harvey Weinstein didn’t pin down all his victims, in fact, some of them willingly got in their car and went to meet him. Louise Godbold explains coercion.
Hierarchy of abuse
Society has ranked types of abuse in a hierarchy it considers most to least bad, and even buckets abuse into legitimate and illegitimate categories.
How to protect your kids over the holidays
The holidays are a time of joy and magic for children. Learn how to protect your kids over the holidays, and keep the magic in their lives.
The last time I spanked
The last time I spanked my child was the first time I did.She was not quite 3 years old. I will never forget how her eyes and her tears made me feel.
How to be an ally for victims of abuse
It’s important for survivors and victims of abuse to have allies. A friend when going through a rough time. Do you know how to be an ally?
How to spot a sex offender
How do you spot a sex offender? Sex offenders cannot be profiled. There is no specific race, gender, sexual orientation, or education level that defines us.
New York State to invest more in breaking cycle of abuse
New York’s Maternal Home Visiting Programs protect children from Adverse Childhood Experiences like abuse and neglect. Why do we invest so little in them?
My recovery as a sex offender
My recovery as a sex offender started when I stopped making excuses. And it started in the hostile environment of a prison.
Reasons family members side with sexual abusers
Many survivors open up about their abuse only to find that family reactions are just as painful, if not more so, than the original trauma.
Gaslighting: How to recognize and survive it.
Gaslighting is abuse. It is an act of violence, be it domestic violence, workplace, or elsewhere. Know how to recognize and survive it.
How to recover from ACEs
It’s difficult to recover from ACEs, but it can done. This blog gives eight useful tips to recover from ACEs allowing people to go through life with ease.
The parent’s guide to protecting children from pedophiles
Offenders are not men in a trench coat. We are members of your family. We are people you know and trust. We are people who have access to your child.
Pedophiles on YouTube are symptom of a bigger problem
Pedophiles on YouTube: while parents are aghast, they don’t seem to realize that YouTube is only a symptom of a larger problem.
Child abuse statistics. And how to prevent child abuse statistics from increasing
Child abuse continues to increase. There are ways to prevent them from doing so. Decreasing child abuse would make the world safer
Maternal home visiting services prevent childhood trauma, saving lives, and money
20 years ago CDC research on childhood trauma, called ACEs, showed survivors lead shorter sicker lives. Why aren’t we preventing it?
What Parents Need to Know about Sexual Grooming
Understanding the steps of sexual grooming can help parents protect their children. Child molesters use grooming in preparation for committing sexual abuse.
Why men abuse women and what makes them stop
Four decades after domestic violence first became a public issue our courts still don’t understand why men abuse women. That’s dangerous for children.
Should Childhood Trauma Be Treated As A Public Health Crisis?
Researchers followed a group of kids from childhood into adulthood to track the link between trauma in early life and adult mental health. When public health officials get wind of an outbreak of Hepatitis A or influenza, they spring into action with public awareness...
Can people be saved from terrible childhood experiences?
US researchers have found early intervention can help prevent negative childhood experiences in infancy turning into long-term health risks.
Pediatricians strengthen stance against spanking kids
The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that adults caring for children use “healthy forms of discipline.” Read about alternatives to spanking.
Crisis Center counselor Stacey Jones answers 10 questions about surviving sexual abuse
Author:Donna Vickroy If the horror stories shared through the #MeToo movement, the Brett Kavanaugh confirmation hearings, the Catholic church scandal and the Bill Cosby trial have you pondering the extent of sexual abuse and assault in this country, consider that what...
Making my way through hell: A story about facing the trauma of sexual assault
I came from a really poor household. I pulled my family out of extreme poverty. Then my boss raped me, life fell apart, but I recovered.
Facts you may not know about human trafficking
Slavery hasn’t ended; today it’s called human trafficking; using force, fraud or coercion for labor or sexual exploitation. Here are facts about it.
The President Would Never Believe Me
The President wouldn’t believe me. I didn’t disclose my abuse after it happened; I disclosed it when I was ready. So did most of his other victims. So what does that say about us?
Tips parents can use when talking about sexual abuse with children
It’s important for parents to talk about sexual abuse with children. This blog has tips on how to talk about sexual abuse with children.
Adverse Childhood Experiences, addiction and prostitution
An interview with the Stop Abuse Campaign’s Melanie Blow about ACEs, addiction, prostitution and child sex abuse laws and policy.
Overpowering bullies without violence
Bullying is a reality in many children’s lives. But there are things parents can teach their kids to empower them that don’t involve violence.
Examining the vexing link between child abuse and bullying
Some abused children become sullen and depressed, others turn to aggression becoming the exact same thing they fear; a bully.
How do Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) impact your life?
Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) impact our lives from childhood to adulthood. Discover how ACEs affect you.
More than outrage, money is needed to combat child abuse
Outrage alone doesn’t protect children. Money is needed to combat child abuse, but it never seems to be a budget priority. Why’s that?
The Long-term Effects of Bullying on Children
Bullying is related to, and similar to, child abuse in some surprising ways. Here’s what you need to know!
Child sex abuse. Handling disclosure
If a child discloses sexual abuse to you, it could change both of your lives. But a little knowledge can make you into the person an abused child needs.
The One Blog About Pedophile Signals You Won’t Share
Butterflies and other signals pedophiles supposedly identify themselves with and use to express the sex of children they are interested in.
The case for Healthy Families NY and Maternal Home Visiting Programs
New York’s children deserve to be protected from trauma by home visiting programs like Healthy Families NY. Good for kids. Good for taxpayers.
How neglect impacts children
Neglect impacts children. Children that are neglected can find life can be a battle to survive. Neglect is a failure to handle children with proper care.
Battling depression
Depression is a serious illness, and there are things we don’t entirely understand about it. But the good news is that it can be overcome.
Is there more sexual abuse in the Protestant Churches than the Catholic Church?
Is the world of the Protestant churches teetering on the edge of a sex abuse scandal similar to the one that had rocked the Catholic Church?
Causes of stress and natural remedies
Life is stressful. Here are some situations to avoid and some remedies to keep you stress-free. They then live happy and healthy
Be a Helper
Be a helper to make the world a safer place for people to live in. Be a helper to put smiles on people’s faces. These are easy tasks that don’t cost much.
Small steps towards lasting changes in 2018
There are simple things you can do that will make a big difference in your ability to make big life changes in 2018- or any time.
Holiday Safety
Holiday gatherings put children at risk of sexual abuse. We don’t need to avoid them, we need to learn to focus on safety during the holidays.
Spending the holidays with your abuser
Many have the choice of attending holiday parties with their child sex abuser, or avoiding family at the holidays. Not an easy choice.
Santa Claus or not, don’t force your kids to sit on anybody’s knee
I like Santa Claus, don’t you? But I don’t like lying, I don’t like secrets and I don’t like forcing kids to sit on someone’s knee.
This holiday season don’t let abuse beget abuse
Another holiday season; shopping, gift-giving, celebrating, eating and decorating, but also the abuse that impacts our country during the holiday season.
Christmas Present
How many Christmas presents have you bought this year? How many have you received? The best present we can give to anyone who has been abused is presence.
Keep Calm and Holiday On
It’s important to keep calm and holiday on when you’re around a large group of family and friends. This blog post gives tips to keep calm and holiday on.
Survivors Surviving the Holidays
The holidays tend to be a tough time of year for survivors of child abuse. But common decency and thoughtfulness can help you survive the holidays.
How to handle holiday stress
During the seasonal period, people have many tasks. Trying to get to get these tasks done can create holiday stress. Here are tips to handle holiday stress.
The power of tapping
Therapy similar to acupuncture and acupressure gives people a release from chronic pain, emotional problems, addictions, PTSD, and physical diseases.
What you need to know about child sex trafficking
How many children are involved in child sex trafficking in the United States? What can you do to ensure your child doesn’t end up being trafficked?
How do we protect children from ACEs?
How do we protect children from ACEs? Maternal Home Visiting Services are the most effective tool for protecting children from trauma.
An Allhallows Eve Treat for our readers
Halloween is when parents worry about children abducted by pedophiles while they trick-or-treat, despite experts saying that doesn’t happen.
Natural ways of dealing with PTSD
PTSD can be treated with medication, but taking pills for long periods can cause more problems.There are safer, natural ways for people to deal with PTSD.
Educating the unthinkable
Children don’t have the tools to protect themselves from sexual abuse because their parents are often afraid to learn the facts about it.
One sex trafficking survivor’s story
A sex trafficking survivor talks about the path her trauma drove her down and her goal of helping other survivors heal.
What is disclosure?
If your child has been sexually violated, the word ‘disclosure’ takes on a horrifying meaning, what you do next can make or break your child’s future.
The baby in the garbage bag
An unwanted baby was found in a garbage bag in the very city where the Maternal Home Visiting program that could have saved her was invented.
Stress can affect a child in a major way
Researchers discovered early childhood stress, like abuse and neglect, can smolder, harming kids’ brains and other body systems.
Middle-aged white men are dying from “diseases of despair” like suicide and overdose
Middle-aged white men are dying, en masse from “diseases of despair” like suicide and overdose. What are we doing to prevent it?
Adverse Childhood Experiences: Why Kurt Cobain is not the only one
Kurt Cobain’s story isn’t one of personal failure, but one of a person succumbing to his ACE score and the laws of statistics.
What parents should know about child pornography
What every parent needs to know about child pornography and what it means to their family. The answers to 10 good questions.
The Truth About Bathroom Bills
North Carolina’s infamous “bathroom bill” makes life worse for transgendered children and doesn’t protect anyone
He never hit me
If he hit me I would leave. The truth is I still wouldn’t have left then. I would rationalize that hitting me would show him how out of hand things were.
Penn State Revisited
Penn State is back in the news, making now a good time to remember exactly what happened there
Children falling through the cracks
A 12 year old girl reports that her mother is starving her. Parenting classes won’t fix that but maternal home visiting programs will. If we fund them.
What To Be “Aware” Of For Sexual Assault Awareness Month
April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month; beware not all programs that claim to be about rape prevention actually deliver.
The Baby, the Bathwater and the Bad Mother
We love to write bills that punish cocaine-addicted mothers, but we don’t like to help them. Should we punish bad mothers?
Bill Cosby and the “look how well I turned out” defense
Bill Cosby joked about being abused as a child, and the punchline was “look how well I turned out”. That argument deserves re-examination.
Child abuse month. Top ten things you learn by listening to survivors
It’s child sex abuse month.There are things about being a sex abuse survivor that most people don’t know, but everyone should learn.
Mass shootings have become our new “norm”
Mass shootings become our new normal. Is this new normal because of violent movies and video games? Can we prevent mass shootings in the US?
The facts behind missing children like Krystal Alvarez
Discover the facts behind missing children and the scary stories that we hear. How do you protect your child?
They break, you know
They break, you know. These children we leave behind. Foster care kids have high Adverse Childhood Experience scores. Like all children they thrive on love.
When the abuser is a child…
What if the abuser is a child. About 40% of child sexual abuse is committed by minors. Some are 17 years old. But some are very young children.
Incest: Why I keep talking about it
It’s never easy to talk about being raped. It’s never easy to use words like “incest” and “victim” about yourself. I still do it, and I have my reasons why.
A new old-fashioned look at mental illness
Our understanding of mental illness changed over the time, but it keeps going back to childhood experiences. The ACE study solidified that.
Pleading For Power
When we are angry, we are not powerful. We are pleading for power. We are feeling powerless, not powerful. Anger isn’t bad or wrong – just inefficient.
Predators using secret signals. Fact or Fiction?
Do you know how to protect your child from sex abuse? You won’t really know unless you understand the facts. Knowledge is power after all.
Sex offenders. Should we castrate them?
We all say we don’t like sex offenders, but we don’t like protecting kids from them, either
The power of letting go of judgement
Judging others is something I do when I’m afraid to love, when I can’t accept love because I can’t accept myself. When we accept others we accept ourselves.
The story of surviving myself
A great life, the consequences of childhood trauma catching up, surviving and then going on to found the Stop Abuse Campaign
Should we invest in Maternal Home Visiting programs?
Testimony in New York State calling for Maternal Home Visiting programs to be broadly available as a way of dramatically reducing abuse and neglect.
Don’t get mad keep your cool
As a parent, it may be hard to keep your cool with some of the thing’s children do. You may feel like your about to lose it. Here are tips to keep your cool.
Recovery from sexual abuse
Recovering from sexual abuse can be difficult. A parents role in their child’s recovery sets the tone for a path of healing or not.
We have more control over our feelings and responses than we thought.
Feeling happy, content, comfortable or satisfied when things go well? What determines whether you feel good or bad? Control over our feelings and responses.
A teacher was fired for sexual abuse
A teacher was fired for sexual abuse with students. No teacher should put students through sexual abuse. If one does, he or she should be fired
Self care. Our number 1 priority
What happens when survivors put themselves and their own self-care first? They become healthier and stronger, and so do those around them.
Babies born addicted to drugs
Opioids: a tiny addict is born every 19 minutes. Maternal home visiting programs protect children better than foster care but we’re not using them.
Outrage does not prevent child abuse
We’re shocked by stories of children murdered and horribly abused, but don’t spend enough to protect children through Maternal Home Visiting programs.
An Open Heart
Those of us who were abused as children have lived with closed hearts. We were not given the chance to open our hearts and show our feelings.
The man who raped me is dead
The man who raped me is dead. The start of an emotional roller coaster. Because every day we are surviving…even the day our rapist dies.
Forgiving the father who beat me
Looking at my father I didn’t see the man who lay on my bedroom floor to protect me from the monsters in my dreams. I saw the monster. And I forgave him.
The other kind of motherless mother
Being a motherless mother is hard, the impact of a mother who has mental illness becomes clear when you become a mother yourself
The nonsense of beating sense into kids
There is no evidence that beating kids in school does any good. There is plenty of evidence that it does a lot of harm. So why does it persist?
I learned to never ask for help
I learned not to ask for help. I had to be strong, Never rely on other people. If you need other people then maybe you’re nothing.
Recovering from abuse
Jackie McCullough recovered from years of physical, sexual and emotional abuse. Here she shares some suggestions so you can do the same.
Why I Choose to be Fat
I will not be measured and weighed and found wanting. I’m going to be OK as I am, even if I am obese. Find out why I choose to be fat.
Five Murdered Children. One Solution. And No One is Talking About It.
New York City is dealing with a rash of murdered children. In the midst of finger-pointing, no one is talking about the one real solution to the problem.
I know where a dangerous sex offender lives… but I can’t tell you
I know the whereabouts and habits of a dangerous sex offender, the one who abused me. And until we change the law, there’s nothing I can do about it.
Substance-abuse doc says to focus on ACEs
Prominent addiction expert says we need to think of addiction as a response to childhood adversity. A ritualized compulsive comfort-seeking.
Monster shapes. What they can tell us about child abuse
When you ask a child to make a monster, you learn who the monsters in their world are and you may find one of those monsters is child sex abuse.
Maternal home visiting programs protect children from abuse and murder
Communities can prevent abuse with maternal home visiting programs that equip mothers, like VernayLah Laventure, to build healthy families
RIP Ariana Smyth
There are lessons that can be learned from Arianna Smyth’s death that would spare other children
Human trafficking, pedophile rings, and what you need to worry about
We can’t talk and learn enough about child sex trafficking and pedophile rings. Protecting children requires actions that are harder, and more mundane.
Child sex abuse: How much was I worth?
“As a 13 year old I didn’t use all the right labels, but words like “rape” and “incest” were the first.” We must protect children from child sex abuse
Are Most Child Sex Offenders Heterosexual?
The overwhelming majority of pedophiles and child sex offenders are heterosexual males. Pedophilia and homosexuality are as different as apples and oranges.
The cost of child sexual abuse
A study saying the cost of child sexual abuse within the Catholic church has cost $3.99 billion over the last 65 years shows taxpayers still foot the bill.
Why are we teaching children to be violent?
We send subtle messages to our children that as long as someone loves you it is okay for them to hurt you. Children’s violence is taught.
